Twice in one week!

On Sunday Coaching was on 60 minutes
Watch it here
and
On Friday the Value of Failure was on 20/20

I wrote about value of Failure on September 1, 2007 in my newsletter

Cirque du Soleil has a secret, and it’s big.

It is that the performers are failures. They fail consistently, every day, every show, sometimes every minute.

Every performer, every day—failure.

Recently I went to a Cirque du Soleil show—not my first, but the first I’ve seen with my high-performance-coaching eyes. What I saw, besides an incredibly entertaining show and story with amazing tricks, choreography, and acrobatics, was a bunch of mistakes—failures, if you will. I suspect very few in the audience noticed the mistakes, but I did, and it got me thinking about failure, and its value in high performance.

Each of those performers has failed so many times in practice, if they are going to fail during the performance, they know when and how it will happen. They know this because it has already happened hundreds, thousands of times. It happens in practice, in rehearsal, even in the shows.

One performer, a clown-like character, was doing gymnastics and tricks on a ladder. In addition to doing the tricks, he had to keep the ladder on its two feet. To begin any trick, he had to balance and climb the ladder. Three times he got part or most of the way up and slid back down, as if that were part of the show. Truth was, he was failing. He had lost control of the ladder and needed to start over.

How did he know?

My guess is he had failed hundreds of times in practice and in shows. That did not stop him from going on in front of a crowd of people each night and failing—again.

How many times have you not done something because you might fail?

How many times have you had a great idea or been inspired about something and then did not go for it because you think it might not work out?

In our culture we do not tolerate the learning curve. We expect that we can do something perfectly the first time, and if we suspect in the slightest way that we can’t, then we won’t even try, because we might fail.

Of course you’re going to fail! It’s the only way to learn. Wow! Now that’s a powerful double-bind we’re in: I can’t try because I might fail, but I can’t learn because in order to learn I have to fail. No wonder some people never get off the couch.

How does the ladder guy know what to do when he loses his balance? He has learned through failing how to stay on, and very important, how to fail.

Cirque is a great show, and really just a series of failures made to look as if they were meant to be. When the performers mess up, they don’t stop and say, “Wait, wait, stop the show, I just messed up, I need to start over.” No, they go on as if nothing happened, as if that was part of the show.

How do you handle it when you begin to fail? Do you push on through or put the brakes on, stop the event, get out of the car, and make yourself wrong?

The difference between high performers and low performers is, high performers have made thousands more mistakes than low performers.

In the January 2007 issue of Outside magazine, America’s greatest runner, Dean Karnazes, who runs ultra marathons (50 or 100 miles at a time) and who just ran 50 marathons in 50 states in 50 days, talked about failure.

“Unless you are pushing yourself, you are not living to the fullest. You cannot be afraid to fail, but unless you fail, you have not pushed enough. If you look at successful people and happy people, they fail a lot, because they are consistently trying to expand and go further….”

Oh, and what about baseball players? The mean batting average of a professional ball player is something less than .300. (The all-time record for batting average in the major league is held by Ty Cobb at .366.) That means a player gets on base—succeeds—only three of every 10 times he goes up to bat. What? Yep, they are willing go to the plate knowing that on any given day, years and years of statistics support that seven out of 10 times they will fail.

And before you go to the plate, you want to know for sure. Are you crazy?

What makes them willing to go to the plate despite the odds?

The real paradox is that being able to manage that level of failure is one of the reasons they become professionals. What? Yes, in all three examples, these high performers are all doing the same thing putting themselves in a position to fail, expecting not to, knowing the possibility of it, being prepared for the possibility, having enough experience to know what failure feels like, and still being willing to go to the plate, attempt to run 100 miles or get on the wobbly ladder in front of hundreds of people.

High performance, then, does not mean making no mistakes. It means tolerating your learning curve and the failure that will come with learning long enough to get into a position to succeed.

What are you willing to fail for? What would you do if you knew you could not fail? Does failure really exist, or have we made it up to keep ourselves small?

Curious about high performance? Let’s talk.

“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.”

—Thomas Edison, inventor

Copyright 2007 Greystone Guides. All rights reserved.

What’s wrong with these kids today?

Generation Y or Generation Why?

Original published by Mattison Grey January 23, 2007

Do you feel as if the older you get, the younger they seem? The twenty-something employees keep coming, and each year they seem younger. And each year, the gap between you and the twenty-somethings you’re working with gets wider, and the leadership chasm deepens. Twenty-somethings are entering the workforce and frustrating forty- and fifty-something managers with their apparent lack of motivation, their carefree attitude, and their unwillingness to tolerate a work environment that doesn’t meet their seemingly unreasonable demands.

Do you find yourself working with twenty-somethings and confused by them? Whether they’re in the role of your subordinate, client, friend, or (my heavens!) your supervisor, knowing what is important to them will make those relationships stronger.

As the American workforce ages, companies have no choice but to hire the next generation of Millennials. The challenge is that Generation X, the Boomers, and the veterans have little more than a clue how to deal with them. I have lost count of how many forty-, fifty-, and sixty-something managers have asked me, “What do I do about these kids? How do I motivate them, and how do I retain my great talent?”

Many of these twenty-somethings are very talented, and they know it. They also know that their skills and knowledge are in high demand. They are not motivated by antiquated management or dictatorial leadership techniques, and they won’t tolerate any of that. If they encounter these situations, they know there’s another company right down the street that will treat them better. They often don’t hesitate to look for greener pastures.

What? You don’t think you’re the one that needs to make the adjustment? Pack your bags or close the shop now; this tension is not going away, and the “old folks” are going to have to be the ones to make the adjustment. Here are your choices: change or flounder.

The big question is: What do they want? And how can we adjust our leadership to align with the younger generation’s desires? Here’s a short list of their spoken and unspoken demands:

First and foremost, they want to be acknowledged for their accomplishments. They want to be recognized for their individual effort and their contribution to the success of the project or team. Gone are the days where you could pat them on the back, say “good job,” and go back to work. That just won’t fly anymore.

A close second is authenticity. As a leader, if you are not being authentic, truthful, and inspired, your credibility is suspect, and you will never win their respect. Members of this generation are very perceptive, and they will know right away when you are blowing smoke—sometimes even before you know you’re doing it.

Third, forget about engagement with this group (and all your employees for that matter). They were born “engaged.” That’s a minimum requirement. What they want—what they will go to the end of the earth for—is inspiration. They want to come to work every day and leave inspired, and they want that for you, too.

What’s the solution? Here are three ways to start to build the bridge over to Generation Why?:

You have to go for your inspiration: find a way to be inspired and inspire your people every day. How do you inspire them? Start by finding out what they really want and then help them get it.

Be authentic in your actions and your words. Most important, tell the truth. This generation is very literal and straightforward. If one of them did the lion’s share of the work on a project, but in public you say, “Under my leadership we…,” the employee is not afraid to say, “No, that’s not accurate. You didn’t do anything.”

As a leader, you have to acknowledge your people multiple times each day. This means paying attention to what they are doing, resisting the temptation to compliment and praise, and saying what they did in a way that conveys appreciation, but doesn’t make the acknowledgment about you.

Do these three things, and you’ll have a fighting chance of retaining your best talent and producing the results you want for you, Gen Why?, and your organization.

Coaching Tools for Leaders: The UH Executive Coaching Institute

Copyright 2007 Greystone Guides. All Rights Reversed

What is Coaching? NOT

What is coaching?

Lets talk about what it is not.

Professional Coaching is not:

Telling

Feedback

Correction

Suggestion

Thinking for

Teaching

Mentoring

Manipulating

Managing

Cajoling

Training

If you are doing any of these things and calling it coaching, you have a big problem.

If you have problem with that statement then you have an even bigger problem.

True Professional Coaching has only one definition:

Finding out what someone really wants and assisting them to get it

Everything else is something else

In the Presence of Brilliance

Written and originally published by Mattison Grey 9/06/2006

It doesn’t happen very often—in fact, hardly ever—but when it does WOW!

A couple of weeks ago, I had the honor of being in the presence of someone who was in their brilliance. I can’t tell you the last time I had that opportunity, and the scarcity is what made it special. After it was over, it began to dawn on me what I had just witnessed. I had to sit and consider what had just happened, and I have to say it was very emotional. Then I immediately began to think about when I could I see it again.

Before I tell you who and where, let’s talk about this thing called “being in your brilliance.”

First there is a difference between being brilliant and being in your brilliance. There are brilliant people, and then there is being in your brilliance. Everyone is brilliant in many ways. Doing the “thing” that you were put on the planet to do—that is being in your brilliance. Some people spend their entire life looking for it and wondering what they are looking for. A few are lucky enough to find it and be able to do something about it.

Examples of people in their brilliance are pretty hard to cite.

When Tiger Woods plays golf he is in his brilliance, and when he plays like he played last week he is also in the zone. But the thing about Tiger is he was born to play golf. This seems clear when we look at his accomplishments, both in what he has done on the golf course and what he has caused in the world. Do a little research on his foundation and his impact on kids through golf and you’ll see. Sure, he’s a great athlete, but the question is if he would have chosen basketball or football, would he be as good? My answer is no, he would not be the Tiger Woods of basketball or football. He is what and who he is because golf is his brilliance. If you disagree, that’s perfectly fine, but you can’t argue with results.

Results are one big clue that someone may be in their brilliance—amazing results and phenomenal impact. Speaking of impact, often the way the experience impacts us is that we are inspired to go out and do the thing we see them doing.

When have you been witness to someone in their brilliance? What were you born to do?

The unlikely place I found a guy in his brilliance was Laff Stop in Houston, Texas. Most people who are doing stand-up comedy are not in their brilliance, but this guy Josh Blue was. It was the most amazing example I personally have ever witnessed. Josh’s story is an incredible one—born with cerebral palsy, he began doing stand up in college and then won the nationally televised show Last Comic Standing. He is now on a nationwide, sold-out tour, standing on stage doing his brilliance each day. The big question is: Did he win Last Comic Standing because he had cerebral palsy, or does he have cerebral palsy so he could find his brilliance and win?

It is a very provocative distinction.
My answer is yes.

What is yours?

Copyright 2006 Greystone Guides. All Rights Reserved